I do not miss Austin.
I went back this week to clean the apartment and pack the things. I did a good job of accumulating quite a lot of shit during my short stint living in Texas. And, as predicted by my past behavior, I procrastinated cleaning and packing until I had approximately five hours left in my three days of allotted time. Somehow I always manage to just barely be ready to go by the time my ride shows up. All of my things are now bagged and boxed and sitting in my closet, to be moved next week.
On my way from my apartment to the airport, I realized I may never see Austin again.
Which is very fine and causes me zero cares. Good riddance, to the city of broken relationships, hot as fucking fuck weather, and zero Sadey-friends.
I’m applying for a couple of jobs within the company I’ve been temping for. Cross your fingers for me! I’ve come to a major realization: Being a self-employed author is feasible, and I could totally do it if I actually wrote. However, as an introverted person, working alone and living alone, this option isn’t viable unless I want to be very, very unhappy and potentially dead.
Writing will be my hobby. If I manage to develop a social circle and maintain a few relationships, I might consider going back to self-employedness in a year or two. But, man…going to work every day and being forced to interact with people has helped me immensely. My depression hasn’t vanished, but it feels lighter, and I no longer want to suffocate myself in a turkey oven bag.
One of the positions I’m going for is an admin assistant gig, and would leave my brain with plenty of extra space to think up smutty stories. The other position is actually a writing job, which I’d prefer because it pays more, but I’m worried that’ll tap me out on writing and make me not want to write during my off time. Which would be very sad for all the Sadey stories that I’m holding hostage in my brain. Those stories want, so badly, to escape and be shared. They want to become the masterbatory material of hundreds, no!, thousands of hornballs who’re seeking quality wanking material.
And considering I’m looking for purpose in my life, I’d say that creating decent smut is a damn good start. Our world is really lacking in pornography.
Hugs and kisses, belts and switches!