A bit of a bummer day

It is funny how life goes up and down.

Yesterday: so fun! Lots of work done and lots of fun had.

Today: so sad!

Up down up down, rollercoasters.

I got CC’d an e-mail. The sender included the entire previous conversation, I assume inadvertently, in which a different friend of ours blamed both N and I for two things of which we were not responsible (and had already said that we didn’t do!).

Not big things, not life-altering things, but petty little things. Things that wouldn’t have really mattered if we had been responsible.

So I’m not so much annoyed that I’m being accused of doing things I didn’t do. I’m hurt because I’m being accused behind my back.

Good friends come to you when they thing you’ve done them wrong. I guess I’m mostly sad because I’m realizing the number of good friends I have is much lower than I’d like.

But, as N says, we can only control ourselves. And to be honest, I definitely have a similar problem in my personality: when something someone does starts to bother me, I usually won’t say anything. I’ll let the problem fester until the magnitude is ten times greater than what it originally was. And that… well, it’s silly.

I’m a nervous person and have trouble confronting people. But I hope I can work on that, and become better at handling conflict.

For now, I don’t feel like writing or working. I want to curl up with N and watch something to make me forget about the day. Forget that I don’t live in a perfect world, and my friends are not perfect people.

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